Monthly Archives: March 2013

so be careful who it is you’re talking to // tmi tuesday #20

(I love this image. I wish I could say it was me. But it’s not.)

Hey everyone! Happy Tuesday once again. I skipped a couple weeks of TMI Tuesday; two weeks ago I was actually just offended by the first question about Lent. Why would you assume that I observe Lent? That seemed like a poor assumption and, as I’m incredibly unfond of religion, I was sort of turned off to all the other questions as well. Last week was incredibly crazy and I was not at my best. But that’s a different story for a different time/different blog. This week’s questions are really good though!

1. What made the best sex partner you’ve ever had so good?

A combination of things. I was at a high point of sexual confidence, so I had no problem telling him what I liked and what I wanted. While every guy I’ve been with has wanted to make sure it was good for me (those are their exact words), I hadn’t really figured out what would make it really good until this guy. Second, he was willing to do what I wanted, even though it wasn’t exactly what he wanted/wasn’t really something that worked for him. In other words, he was willing to dominate me because I wanted him to, not because he actually wanted to. He would have much preferred to cuddle me and have very gentle sex, but that’s not really my thing after the first few times. Lastly, we loved each other and I trusted him so that the idea of submitting was safe and hot, rather than anxiety-ridden.

2. What made the worst sex partner you’ve ever had so bad?

All of the opposite things from 1. I did not really like him, did not entirely trust him, and honestly wanted him to just shut up the whole time. Our personalities clashed, and I wasn’t as willing to open up and tell him what I liked. Actually, I told him what I didn’t like – the lights on – and he ignored me. Which I let go. My bad. He was very overbearing and tried too hard to take control. Normally, I like this, but he wasn’t good at it so I lost interest quickly. He also asked me to do things that made me really uncomfortable. As much as I wanted to not judge and explore, it was incredibly unsatisfying sex. I should have asked him to leave the minute he asked me to speak in Japanese to him.

3. Who was the most physically attractive person you ever had sex with?

UHHHH. I don’t have sex with good-looking people. Probably my last partner. I thought he was very handsome in a sort of boy-next-door way. Not so good-looking that I was intimidated, but enough so that I was attracted but comfortable.

4. How was it?

It was always good, and sometimes it was downright amazing. We were long-distance, so we got pretty good at communicating. See almost everything I’ve written about our sex.

5. Who was the least physically attractive person you ever had sex with?

Oh that’s so subjective and I feel so bad ;___; (Do I count? I have sex with myself a lot.) Probably the Friend With Benefits I had while in grad school. He’s adorable, but in an adorable way. Not really in a drop-your-panties kind of way.

6. Why did you do it?

I really needed sex. That sounds incredibly shallow, but true.

7. How was it?

Eh, it was okay. Again, unsatisfying because we weren’t really in a relationship. I told him what I liked, but he wasn’t really into it; he actually admitted most of the time he was “too tired” to do things that would really get me going. So I got like, half-sex.

Bonus: Describe a bad sexual experience you admit was your fault.

The aforementioned bad sex. I admit that it was my fault because I shouldn’t ever have slept with him. That would have made my life a lot easier. He was persistent so I gave in (shut up, I know you’re judging me), and that was a huge mistake.

(Image from theclassypolaroid on Tumblr)