Monthly Archives: April 2012
Yesterday and today have been rough. Normally I would be way more excited about these questions (I was when they went up on Sunday!), but right now I’m just not feeling sexy or intimate. I feel very distant and cold and a little bit like I’m standing on the edge of a cliff. I’m afraid I’m just thinking too hard, but that if I don’t think that hard I won’t be happy either. Life’s a bitch sometimes.
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions are on a subject near and dear to our hearts (and some other body parts, too). It’s all about SEX!… Yes, again.
1. What is your sexual personality?
a. The Controller – initiating sex, twisting your lover into positions you want, and driving scene play by play
b. Sex Slave – You love to be used and at the mercy of your lover. You don’t initiate but follow and do as you are told. You love to be used.
c. Daredevil – Sexual adventure and sexual thrills are what you are all about. You get off on the risk factor.
d. Subdued – Sex is a necessary part of the relationship so you are available when needed.
2. How many times have you sneaked away from party guests to have sex in another part of the party venue. Where did you sneak to? Were you ever caught? For example, at a wedding reception you sneaked to have sex in the coat room. At a party, you sneaked to have sex in a bathroom or closet.
Never. I’ve never been to a party, and I’ve definitely never been to a party with anyone.
3. Your sex partner that you are mad crazy for has requested you do one of the following, which one would you grant consent to do:
a. Bondage/light restraint with your hands, legs tied while having sex
b. A sexual spanking that leaves light marks
c. Record the two of you having sex
d. Have sex in a mirrored room where you can see yourselves having sex from every angle
Any of the above, provided I trusted them enough in addition to being madly attracted to them.
4. Do you act out your sexual fantasies (select one)? Why?
a. I act out all of my fantasies.
b. I act out many of my fantasies.
c. I act out some of my fantasies.
d. I act out very few of my fantasies.
e. I don’t act out any of my fantasies.
f. I don’t have any fantasies.
Hmmmm… Probably D. Most of my fantasies are exactly that – fantasy – and based on a set of highly unlikely (and, in fact, apparently impossible) scenarios that I couldn’t really get to happen. I don’t really have big, vague fantasies; rather, I fantasize about a particular partner and particular situations or acts. For example, sex in the backseat of his car, or hotel room sex after a day of driving around visiting comic book stores and walking along the edge of the beach because we hate sand. See? Weirdly specific. So unless I can get those situations to line up (which, I’ve been informed, is not going to happen) I won’t get to act them out.
I have had some simpler ones that we’ve played on, but I don’t have many of those.
5. How important is sex in your life (select one)?
a. I could hardly survive without it.
b. It is very important.
c. It is somewhat important.
d. I could live without it.
e. If it were up to me, sex wouldn’t even exist!
Depends on what we mean by sex. I’m somewhere in the B-D spectrum. By that I mean that for a long time, I have lived without it, if we specifically mean sex with a partner. If we take a broader view of sex that includes phone sex, Internet sex, erotica, masturbation, etc., then C might be more accurate. I’m not sure I actively seek out these venues for sex, but they turn up with frequency (sort of on a when-I-feel-like-it basis) so I’m willing to accept that they must be important. B is only true for having a partner.
Bonus: Finish the following phrase.
Sex is preceded by grope-y snuggling and followed by snuggly spooning.
(Image originally posted by lust-sex-love on Tumblr. Click on the link to check her out!)
Happy two-months to the blog! I’m pleasantly surprised I’ve been able to keep this up (:
I had hoped I would have something special in mind for today, but alas. Work and organizing myself around my “I’ve been out of grad school for a year hooray!” deadline has been keeping me busy. Instead, I’ll post about something super useful: cleaning sex toys. I realize that a lot of people have this information, but I know that some of my friends don’t and I think it’s important to share.
Cleaning toys starts with knowing about the different materials that manufacturers are using. There are tons of different materials, but there are some main ones that you are most likely to see.
The easiest ones to clean are hard materials, like glass, wood, ceramic, metal, and hard plastic. These are the easiest because they are non-porous (in a pretty obvious way) and can be washed like you would wash dishes. Glass toys can even be put in the top rack of a dishwasher. Most toys like this don’t have vibrators or other parts that you would need to be careful with. What you do need to be careful with is accidentally breaking a glass toy. Few glass toys will break if dropped, but they can crack or become chipped.
Silicone toys are also easy to clean. Silicone is non-porous, so you can wash them with soap and warm water or put them in the top rack of a dishwasher. What makes many silicone toys less easy to clean is that a number of vibrators are made with silicone – obviously, you don’t want to put that precious motor in the dishwasher! Soap and warm water will still work, as long as you are careful with the toy. Some toys are waterproof so they’re easy to clean; others have seams where the silicone meets a plastic handle or controls and these can make cleaning a bit more complicated. Just be careful!
Silicone-blend toys are, in my opinion, little bitches. Yes, they can be more durable than a pure silicone toy, but they can also be very misleading if you are not reading carefully. Silicone-blend toys can be porous, so they should be covered with a condom for ease. Condoms keep the toy clean and safe. Keep this in mind when looking at the materials list of toys.
Like the silicone-blend toys, jelly toys (or soft plastic toys) are porous and should be covered with a condom. These toys are usually nice and soft, but can’t really be cleaned effectively because they are porous, so a condom is the best way to go. Additionally, you can simply avoid jelly toys, but this is a matter of personal preference.
Antibacterial soap is generally sufficient. Dishwashing soap is easy and you probably have it around. Make sure that you wash thoroughly, let the soap sit for a few minutes, and then rinse well. Make sure that you rinse carefully! Let the toys air dry so they don’t get extra dirt or lint on them. It’s a good idea to wash your toy again before its next use as well.
In lieu of soap and water, antibacterial toy cleaners can also be used. They are safe for your toys (the kind that can be cleaned, of course) and eliminate the need for soap (if it’s not handy) and possibly water (for example, if you live in a dorm with shared bathrooms). Like lubricant, they come in small, discreet bottles and can be kept close by. Some can be wiped off with a clean towel!
Right now, Happy Buzz Reviews is giving away a small bottle of Renew Toy Cleanser from Good Vibrations. Renew Toy Cleanser is organic, so it’s not at all harmful to you or your toys. It does say it is lightly scented, but the ingredients list is short and it seems like it smells a little citrusy.
Head over to the link above to enter! Entering is pretty easy, though two of the entry types require Facebook login.
If you have more questions about sex toy materials or cleaning your sex toys, check out any of the major online sellers for more information.
If you are hesitant about confessing crimes… lie… be creative.
1. Do you know how to pick a lock? Have you ever used this skill to gain unauthorized access?
No ): I’ve thought that it might be a good idea, but I’ve never actually learned how.
2. Do you know how to open a safe with a rotary combination lock? Have you ever used this skill to gain unauthorized access? What did you find?
No ): Maybe not as good an idea as being able to pick a lock… What if “they” pick me up and want me to start doing bank jobs for them?!
3. Have you ever made a copy of a key you were not supposed to have? Did you use it to gain unauthorized access? What were you looking for? Did you find it?
Actually, yes. My first landlady was off her rocker (or getting there) and told me I couldn’t make copies of my keys (one for the front door, one for my door). I thought this was stupid, as I was going to be out of town a lot (I was a grad student) and needed someone to take care of my fish and check up on things while I was out for months at a time. The couple that lived downstairs had keys since they were the “managers” of the place, but they had family and wouldn’t always be around. Also, it seemed supremely stupid that I couldn’t have a copy of the keys in case of an emergency, either in my car or with a trusted friend. So I made copies of the keys. I never needed them.
4. Have you ever stolen or guessed a password? Did you use it to gain unauthorized access? What did you do?
Hmmm… Actually, no. I’ve been given all passwords that I’ve needed for anything. I often have to guess my own password, but that’s just because I suck at remembering things.
5. Do you know how to get data from a computer that requires a password you don’t know?
6. Do you know how to record a telephone call? Have you ever done so secretly? Did you hear anything interesting? What?
I… assume you do something to the telephone. The only way I think I could manage it is if I had a separate recording device in the room with each of the participants and then I pieced together the conversation afterward.
7. Have you ever used a webcam or nanny cam to photograph someone secretly?
No ): The only person in front of my webcam ever is me ):
8. Have you ever used an infrared camera to photograph someone secretly in the dark?
Who has one of those?
9. Have you ever learned anything important by deliberate eavesdropping?
Most of my eavesdropping is accidental. Furthermore, I don’t really remember anything I’ve learned specifically by eavesdropping.
10. Do you know how to hot-wire a car?
No. I could see situations in which this would probably be a good idea, but I hope I’m never in one of them.
Bonus: Have you ever been paid for your sexual skills? What skill(s) did you perform?
No. Part of me is a little disappointed by this – paying for grad school is expensive. But most of me is pretty sure that bad things would happen if I ever were paid for my sexual skills. The only thing I do sort of wish I could do/had done is pole dancing for money. Alas, being a grad student is surprisingly busy work.
(Image originally posted by sexy-yetclassy at Tumblr. Click on the image to go there!)
Hello! Sorry I’m late this week, I was in New York visiting people!
Love, Hate, and Guilty Secrets. We never mind telling people about things we love or hate, but how about the things we love, but would hate for anyone to find out about?
Well, it’s time to free yourself of that fear!
For each of the categories below, list one thing you love, one that you hate, and then, take a deep breath and tell us something you hate to admit you love.
You’ll feel better for it!
I love Japanese food.
I hate Thai food (only because I’m allergic to peanuts, and Thai food has lots of it).
My guilty secret is … white chocolate?
(I’m really not ashamed to admit all the food I like. I think food is cool. But people tend to hate white chocolate and be judge-y about it not being “real” chocolate.)
I love jeans.
I hate anything that shows my midriff.
My guilty secret is socks.
I love children’s and young adult fantasy.
I hate the last Harry Potter book.
My guilty secret is The Dresden Files.
I love “Want You To Want Me.”
I hate pretty much anything by Katy Perry.
My guilty secret is “Till the World Ends.”
I love While You Were Sleeping.
I hate … Well I’m not really sure.
My guilty secret is Dodgeball.
6. TV Show
I love The Big Bang Theory.
I hate most reality TV.
My guilty secret is White Collar.
(Okay, but TV is like food. I’m pretty open about all the things I love.)
7. Celebrity Crush
I love … Joseph Gordon Levitt?
I hate … Kanye West?
My guilty secret is … Adam Levine?
(I’m very confused. I don’t really have celebrity crushes.)
8. Music Group
I love Savage Garden.
I hate Katy Perry (though technically not a group).
My guilty secret is the Backstreet Boys.
(The Backstreet Boys is a grad school inside joke.)
9. Sports Team
I love the UCLA Bruins.
I hate the USC Trojans.
My guilty secret is that I’m not a Lakers fan.
Sex Position or Sex Act or fetish
I love doggy style.
I hate cowgirl or anything that requires me to be on top in a way my partner can see the parts of me that I think are ugly.
My guilty secret is oral sex.
(Again, not a particularly guilty secret. I’m pretty open about the fact that I love giving oral sex.)
(Thanks to Scum Bag Crew on Tumblr for the image. Click on the picture to go there!)
Hooray! I’m almost on time this week! Good thing, because I’m off on another trip tomorrow morning (: Hopefully I’ll also be on time for next week’s post… *crosses fingers*
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions focus on sexual desire.
(By the way, the original TMI Tuesday post has “Sex on Fire” by Kings of Leon. I love that song. And I wouldn’t love it if it weren’t for my partner. He enriches my life in so many ways!)
1. Answer the question: What makes you hot?
I really need mental stimulation. Weirdly enough, a really intense or interesting lecture or presentation can get me hot. Apparently I have a thing for intelligence… which should probably not surprise me. Makes sense then that my partner is a teacher. This extends into sex – I can be stimulated without touch, just by being engaged mentally, just by thinking. Actual sex has often been a letdown because my mind stopped being interested and engaged and started to wander. I’m sure it’s easier for me to stay focused when I really care about or love my partner, but I’ve definitely been in situations where was definitely not being mentally or intellectually stimulated.
2. What is it that you want, when you look at porn?
a. To feel happy
b. To learn
c. To relax, relieve tension
d. To orgasm
Um, why is “foreplay” not an option? I suppose the closest is C. To be honest I’ve only ever watched porn for a class (yes, you read that correctly). I’ve mentioned it to my partner, but only because I think it would be good foreplay to get us both turned on and going so we can have fun with each other.
3. You’ve been asked to be a part of a porn movie production. Which job will you do? Why did you select that?
a. The star of the porn film–Doug Hardwicke or Fachina Istite
b. The director–staging the scenes and directing the actors, lighting, camera shots, etc.
c. The fluffer–you’re in charge of keeping the actors “excited” about their work
d. The camera person getting all the tight, up in there, close shots
I would love to say A, because what a waste if I’m not having sex?! Especially with particularly attractive men (or particularly attractive genitals, whichever is the case). But it would be more honest to say D. I can be very focused on a task and wouldn’t let the fact that there are naked people going at it distract me from what needs to get done.
4. Right this very moment you are horny and are looking for a casual hookup for sex. Under which, of the following headings, would you place your ad?
(w=woman, m=man, t=transexual/transvestite)
w4m, m4w, m4m, w4w, t4m, m4t, w4t, t4w, t4mw, mw4t, mw4mw, mw4w, mw4m, w4mw, m4mw, w4ww, m4mm, ww4m mm4w m4ww, w4mm
No, I have not done this. I often casually peruse the ads because sometimes they are particularly amusing. I would most likely use w4m, though in an alternate universe I would have the courage for w4mw or w4mm.
5. From now on, ’til the end of time you will be able to experience sexual pleasure via a single method. From the list below, choose that method. Why did you make that choice?
a. Vaginal penetration
b. Anal penetration
c. Masturbation with your fingers/hand
d. Masturbation with a single favorite sex toy. What is the toy?
e. Being masturbated (e.g. fingered, hand-job) by the fingers/hands of another person
f. Body Touching from another–full body massage, caressing, kneading, licking, sucking, biting, etc but no insertion of anything in any orifices.
g. Oral sex
Process of elimination. I am not too interested in B, C tires me out, I would never be able to pick a single toy in D, E tires out my partner, F is just foreplay, it’s not satisfying, and unfortunately I dislike G. I love giving oral sex, but I hate receiving it. I feel too gross for my partner, basically, which is sad but true. Luckily, I love A. And it’s very versatile. There are so many positions for it.
Bonus: What’s the sexiest thing you did this past weekend? Got any pics or a vid? 😀 ;p
Well I spent all of Saturday on a plane, so the weekend was decidedly unsexy. I spent most of Sunday in my pajamas at the computer. My partner finds it sexy at least.
(Image originally posted by justherguy on Tumblr. Click on the image to go there!)
And we’re back again! This time, I’m a little bit over my Hawai’i vacation and am looking forward to the next trip: Boston and New York! In my experience these are more sophisticated, dirtier, and faster cities than the relaxed, tropical island of Hawai’i.
Just the kind of place for this lovely glass toy from Pipedream’s Icicles line! Glass is a smooth, subtle material that can be used in so many different ways. This is a beautiful toy, not cute and sweet and fun like the Papaya Candy Stick. Glass is sexy and sophisticated and understated, even if this shape is nothing but in your face. The bulbous head, the swirled design, and the clit hook all promise a firm pressure pleasure. Moreover, glass is great for temperature play – just use some hot or cold water to get the desired effect.
The Icicles 16 also comes with a removable 10 function bullet vibrator to intensify and diversify your pleasure.
Luckily for us, Evil Poptart is giving away one of these as well! Visit Sleeping in the Wet Spot to enter. Many of the entries require your Facebook account, but a number can also be completed without it. The giveaway is being sponsored by Pink Cherry. Good luck!
I’m back from Hawai’i! It was a little less vacation-y than I would have liked, but I did get to lie on the beach for awhile and tan (or burn, in the case of my cleavage. Whoops). I’ve been inspired by all the gorgeous flowers and delicious fruit I saw and ate there – there might even be a new line of jewelry in the making!
Which is why I’m so excited that Evil Poptart (what a cute name!) is giving away a Papaya Toys Candy Stick vibrator! Look at how adorable it is! There are two other colors (purple and lime green) that are also adorable, though nothing is as cute as a bright pink toy. The swirls will add a great deal of texture, and the toy offers multiple speeds of 3 different vibration patterns. It’s battery-powered, but I think I can live with that.
Just think how much fun this toy would be to take on an island vacation…~
Evil Poptart’s blog is cute and fun, with lots of pictures and funny anecdotes (the most recent is about the cat and its fondness for threesomes). The ads on the right hand side can be graphic and not discreet, but the content of the blog is still good. I like reading because not all the posts are product reviews; they are sprinkled in amidst actual posts.
So check it out! There are multiple ways to enter. Many require you to use your Facebook account, which is a bit of a downer for me, but others might have an easier time Liking stuff. The giveaway is being sponsored by TabuToys, which, among other things, has a great and sexy color scheme. There are still a few days to get your entries in, so go, go, go!